Untamable

Eleven months.  Is that a long time?  Is that a short time?  My friend Albert Einstein would point out that a moving clock is slower than a stationary one, and that speed is in the eye of the beholder anyway. All things being equal, I guess eleven months is pretty much equivalent to being a work in progress, but I'm kind of proud of this wild, crazy, big-hearted, unpredictable, laughter-filled, generous, hip-shaking, and still-optimistic-despite-all-the-bullshit girl. Like my own hair, I am untamable.

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You Must Not Fall, But You Can Fly

Every single step comes with a heart-stopping moment when you have shifted your center of gravity, when you are perilously swaying on one foot seeking that thin cord with the other.  Each step comes with the slightest frisson of fear.  But if you are to ever reach the solidity of the ground on the other side, if you are ever to join the others waiting across of the chasm, you have to feel it.  You have to embrace the discomfort and recognize that it can help power you across. You have to learn to trust that your foot will find the rope.

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Let There Be Light

Sometimes even the bravest girl can get a little weary.  After the road trips and the adventures and the bucket list items crossed off the list, there's still all that other crap just waiting for her and bit by bit it'll just beat her right back until she's crouching in a dark little corner, trembling at the merest sound. But if she's lucky--if she's really, really lucky--and she reaches her hand out into the darkness, somebody will hand her a flashlight

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Breaking Bread

Whether cross-legged on the floor munching on pizza through a movie, slurping ramen in a cozy little noodle house, or sharing a thermos of hot chocolate on a mountainside, many of my best times of late have included food and friends. A friendship becomes fast and firm when you stuff fistful of shoestring fries into your mouth while laughing. It's a weird trick of physics that when a table is placed between friends, it dematerializes and takes up no space at all.

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Amazing Grace

Nobody is impressed when Superman lifts a couch with one hand to vacuum underneath it.  Amazing people should do amazing things, and frankly they shouldn’t expect any applause for it.  But the rest of us mere mortals—the ones who get toothpaste on our shirts, trip over nothing in our paths, forget to pay the phone bill, and neglect to say “please” or “thank you” at times—we might serve as an example to all the others who face broken furnaces, sick children, flat tires, damaged hearts, or husbands who die.

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Petals Smell Sweetest When Slightly Crushed

Petals are delicate, and I have a bruise radiating outward from my heart, but crushing a Petal also releases her fragrance; it’s only in damaging her a little bit that all the good stuff starts to show.
New Year’s Eve is going to be one of those crushing events.  I’ve always liked the idea of second, and fifth, and tenth chances and I embrace every opportunity to start over and try again.  I'll be doing it alone this time, but at least it'll smell good.

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2016 Will Be Hopeless

2015 was scary; really, really, fucking scary. But I pushed myself to do even more frightening things, and I learned that being scared is not the worst thing in the world. Being scared feels a lot like a reminder that one is, no matter how improbably, still alive. Not only is fear surmountable, but one can derive a real sense of power from overcoming it and even, sometimes, have a bit of fun. So, 2016 bring it. But there will be no hope.

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